Human Johnson

Hello, I'm Parker Vemont. No, not that Parker Vemont. YES, That Parker Vemont. Wealthy Billionare Investment Banker From the Nothern Iowan Region, Of Canadia. I'm here Today to offer you something you couldn't possbily refuse. T-Shirts. What for you may ask? What if I were to take the gentleman on my left and slap him silly? Would that answer your question? No? ...Well...Money. The answer is we're selling these T-Shirts in exchange for cash on Zazzle. (In reality, we're actually two people: Sam and Max. Neither of which knows Parker Vemont with any real grip on his current mental situation. Don't ask why we're called Human Johnson. Don't.)